dialogue from the douglass home

Burke: I don’t like cats.
Bethany: Why don’t you like cats, Burke?
Burke: They want to poop in my sandbox.


(Mark is correcting Liam and poking his finger into Liam’s chest.)

Mark: Don’t…again.
Liam: (dramatic whisper) owww, dad. You’re hurting my heart—you’re hurting Jesus.


(Mark on his way out the door to drop off Liam for preschool)

Bethany: Remember to tell his teacher that his wag-a-bag is in…
Mark: Wag-a-bag? Seriously (do I have to say that)?